Why making money will continue to elude you

This is why making money will continue to elude you:

You believe that money will make you happy.

I know this because I have spent a lifetime making excuses for not seeking or asking for more of it.

I held back on earning more money because I thought it would make me happier.

Wait, what?

This begins to make more sense when we see that the opposite is also true:

‘Losing money will make me unhappy.’

That is the kicker here.

If we think losing money makes us unhappy, we don’t want to risk losing it by exposing ourselves to making more of it.

Make sense?

I feared to make more money because this would introduce a higher risk of losing and spending more of it. I would potentially create more instances of people saying no to my requests.

Asking for more money would increase the pain I’d experience from more lost sales or denied jobs.

And when money is at risk, we think our self-worth; our happiness; our fulfilment too — is at risk.

This is rooted in the belief that having more money will make us happier.

When people say ‘money won’t make you happy,’ what does this even mean?

When I hear this, I hear: ‘money is inextricably linked to your well-being.’

‘Money determines well-being.’

Is that true?

Many people believe this to be a truth.

It is simply not a reality.

Think about it. How can there possibly be a connection, logically?

How can how much money you gain or lose, have an impact on your self-worth; your deeper happiness?

Everything changed for me when I wriggled free of the society’s straight-jacket and its unhelpful outlook on money.

I came to my senses, seeing that:

  • Money is simply a tool.
  • It is totally neutral.
  • It is a man-made means of exchange.
  • It can be used for good or bad.

It has nothing to do with my sense of self-worth.

It is only when we THINK it does that it feels like it does.

But it does not because money is a tool, neither good or bad.

When we can genuinely absorb this, we no longer fear losing it, and we are more open to acquiring more of it.

Do this now.

Really see how you are happy deep inside yourself. See how having more or less money has no effect on this more profound happiness.

When we can see the tremendous good money for which it can be used, we have a reason to create more value, ask for more of it, and make lots more of it.

We are open to making more because hearing no is just information, not a rejection of ourselves.

It’s never personal. It’s about specific circumstances that are always changing.

We can start seeing that money, when viewed healthily, is a means to make a change and contribute, support our families, create space to relax, slow down and create.

And it starts with understanding what money really is.

You are already happy by default, beneath your thoughts.

See money, not as a source of happiness, but as a means to make a difference.

Making a difference.

Money can be used to make a difference, but it can also be seen as a reflection of a difference having been made.

It is a token of thanks you receive from making a difference.

For example, if I coach someone to reach their dream of writing a novel, and I help them to overcome blocks and resistance, I am paid for making a difference.

When I make money, I know I am doing something to make a positive difference in the lives of other people.

And that makes me want to go out and make more of it.

If these ideas stirred something in you, I’d love to read your comment below. I read them all.

If you would like to have a conversation with me, connect here.

Alex

Originally published at https://www.redlemonclub.com on December 29, 2019.

Coach and Illustrator. Helping entrepreneurs lead with confidence. More: www.alexmathers.net ; Illusory book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08B5B9BLH

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