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The happiest introverts I know avoid these four things

Alex Mathers
8 min readFeb 17, 2024

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Despite a recent resurgence, ‘introvertedness’ is still regarded as something of a deficiency, or even a taboo, particularly in the extroverted ‘West.’

If you’re not outgoing, super smiley, and not always seeking out new experiences with friends and new people, you’re, well, a little strange, and quite possibly a serial killer.

At least that is how introversion appears to be presented in the spheres of media, in our schools and in the gossipy torrents of conversation.

Introverts, however, are enjoying something of a resurgence thanks to the web, and a renewed interest in the powers of introverts in the mainstream.

This is a good thing. It is important for highly sensitive introverts like me to know that we’re not unworthy for preferring to be alone with a book, over standing around at a drinks party.

It is crucial for us to understand why introversion isn’t a flaw, but a trait — an advantage even — bringing with it a host of benefits, many of which the more extroverted among us will never honestly know.

The positives introverts can bring to the world, and those around us are immense and well documented. We must cherish this nature in us.

But we need also be careful about the gaps in the pavement, threatening to catch our foot as we journey through the matrix of plan-cancelling, solitary walks, deep-thought, and feverish, coffee-fuelled note-taking.

Below are four pitfalls of which introverts like you and I might be wary.

1. Jumping on the Rumination Train

Us introverts are internally-oriented. We take cues, make decisions and are inspired mostly by the internal. We love to think.

Introverts tend to have a powerful imagination, and, owing to a sense of feeling apart from ‘normal people,’ are often drawn to creative, out-of-the-box, and innovative pursuits.

The danger lies in the downward spiral driven by the combining of a negative outlook with obsessive imagination. This is rumination, and it can negatively charge us, making us depressed and anxious.

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