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Ten unusual behaviours that make people respect you more

Alex Mathers
3 min readNov 3, 2023


Years of sharing this planet with you weirdos taught me much.

Not all human behaviour makes a whole lot of sense.

Here are some habits few use that will turn others on to you…

Sharing something you dislike about yourself.

We’re all terrified of being banished from the crowd and looked at funny, so most of us put energy into appearing wonderful, flawless and virtuous.

Go against the grain and tell us something you dislike about yourself.

This immediately puts you in the minority and shows us something cool: you’re a fucking human.

Smile less.

There is a mystery to those who don’t always smile when you expect them to.

We are intelligent beings and can sense insincere grins.

We’re also tired of fakeness. If someone smiles at everything, it takes the power out of any one smile.

Being sparing with your smiles can show discernment, a thoughtful mind, and authenticity.

Repeating their words.

Most people are hell-bent on emptying out everything they want us to know about their lives and problems.

Few take a moment to turn it around and help others feel heard.

A powerful way to do this is to repeat back some of what people say. This reinforces a strong bond between you.

Make someone uncomfortable.

Woah there, Delilah. What do I mean here?

I am talking about broaching topics of conversation few dare traverse.

If you can move to your edges, and get closer to the truth, instead of pussyfooting around sensitive issues all the time, people will be attracted to your courage.

Be undistracted.

How refreshing is it to see someone speaking to someone who is actively attentive?

It is becoming rare to find someone who isn’t a distracted, fidgety squirrel ferret. So be different. Turn off your freaking phone.