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How to give less of a f*ck about what others think

Alex Mathers
3 min readJan 11, 2025

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I’ve spent my whole life worrying too much about what others think.

It turned me into a jumpy, self-conscious mess.

When I’d ‘give an F,’ it’s because I wanted people to like me. I tried to exert a tight-fisted control on my experience.

Yeah, good luck with that.

This need for control makes us uptight and steals our freedom.

I needed to change. So I geeked out on ways to handle it for over a decade. A lot doesn’t work.

I’ve learned that caring about what others think is 100% linked to our fear of judgement.

It isn’t about caring less. We’d be robots if so.

We need to attach less meaning — less PAIN — to potential judgement from people.

SO, let’s look at the ways we can fear judgement less.

Understanding the following made all the difference for me.

It allowed me to be myself again:

1. Criticism has no effect on your self-worth.

Others have literally no power to decrease your self-esteem. None.

It only seems like it because we think it in our minds. Self-worth isn’t a thing. It’s just an idea.

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Alex Mathers
Alex Mathers

Written by Alex Mathers

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