Eleven things to do if you’re a ‘nice guy’ and want more love, confidence and respect

Might being too nice be holding you back and making you miserable?

Dr. Robert Glover’s excellent book, No More Mr Nice Guy, introduces the concept of helping men break free from the ‘Nice Guy Syndrome’ and reclaim their personal power, authenticity, and fulfillment in life.

The book explores how societal conditioning and childhood experiences can lead men to develop behaviour patterns that prioritise seeking approval, avoiding conflict, and suppressing their own needs and desires at the expense of their well-being.

This manifests as the ‘Nice Guy,’ where men adopt a persona that operates on the assumption that being nice and helpful and serving the needs of others will bring them the love they need and feel is lacking for themselves.

But often this niceness is forced. It’s a kind of fake nice that diminishes one’s confidence and only pushes others away. It’s draining because the love and admiration they seek never comes — often only to be met with disrespect.

I’ve seen this behaviour in myself and in people close to me. I’ve seen how it chips away at a man until he is full of rage or a limp husk of what he could be.