As an awkward teen, I struggled to connect with people.
It made me feel alone and continually frustrated for years.
This drove me to get really, really good at understanding how to connect better with people.
I learned a lot about why some people seem to pull others in while others repel.
Here’s what I learned:
They aren’t trying to be confident (or magnetic).
‘Trying’ gives off a very different energy to simply ‘being.’
When we operate in the mode of ‘try,’ we emphasise the reality that we aren’t there yet.
This feels literally try hard.
So magnetic people don’t force anything and express who they really are.
Their quirks come through.
Attraction is closely tied to authenticity.
When we act like everyone else, we signal our discomfort.
When we allow what makes us different to rise up without resistance, like our geeky interest in gardening, we telegraph what makes us human too.
This is interesting and attractive.
