Being ok with being disliked is the number one life skill

Alex Mathers
2 min readOct 10, 2024

--

We all want to be liked.

It means safety, gifts, validation, a sense of confidence.

I can relate.

My actions over the last 37 years have absolutely been influenced by a deep need to be liked.

It’s why social media works so well.

We get a very real hit of dopamine when someone likes our post or smiles at us in the street.

We’re not far off from those rats given cocaine pellets in an experiment.

They could not stop the need for continual dopamine hits and became easy addicts, giving up on their health entirely just so they could get that hit.

Validation is addictive.

And it makes total sense.

But in our need for being liked, we also introduce a dangerous mechanism into our lives.

Why?

Because if we rely on other people to feel good…

Other people have the power to make us feel bad too.

We are at the mercy of the external.

This is death to self-expression, creativity and ongoing happiness.

It’s not down to us.

--

--